I Wish Damar Hamlin Had Died

In a perfunctory, guilt-ridden spectacle, the entire world offered its "thoughts and prayers" to Buffalo Bills player Damar Hamlin back in January after he nearly died on a football field. It appears that millions upon millions of people genuinely love Damar Hamlin and care about his well-being.

I don't.

Hamlin suffered cardiac arrest after a vicious collision with a player on the other team. But I don't care about Hamlin's heart. I care about the hearts of the 400,000 Americans who die from cardiac arrest every year, most of whom suffered from heart disease due to the build-up of cholestrol and plaque inside the lining of the coronary arteries. The primary cause of this plaque build-up? Obesity. That's right; I care about those who suffer from the disease that affects 40% of Americans and is the #1 killer in our country.

Actually, I don't really care about them either.

I care about Micah Hyde, the player Hamlin replaced in the Bills line-up after Hyde himself suffered a season-ending neck injury. There are approximately 100 neck injuries in the NFL every year, and if you google Reggie Brown, Dennis Byrd, Mike Utley, etc., you can read all about the awful, appalling, atrocious paralyses and near-death experiences that occur regularly in the National Football League of Lawlessness.

I don't actually care about Micah Hyde. I'd never heard of him until recently. But I do care about Dane Jackson, yet another Bills player who was carted off the football field in an ambulance after a scary neck injury about one hour before Hyde's injury.

Just kidding, I don't care about Hyde or Jackson. I care about the real problem in the NFL which isn't neck injuries; it’s CTE (chronic traumatic encephalopathy), a neurological disease resulting from repeated trauma to the head. A 2017 Boston University study found that 99% of brains from deceased NFL players were positive for CTE. In 2013, more than 4,000 former players sued the league, which ultimately settled for $765 million. That was nice, but I still feel nauseated when I think about former NFL player Junior Seau who committed suicide by shooting himself in the heart, presumably so his brain could be used for research on CTE.

The more I think about it though, the less I care about all the players who suffer and suffered from CTE. I mean, these guys chose to play in the league, right? They chose to play a violent sport and they chose to put themselves in harm's way. They knew the risks. Screw them. Everyone knows how dangerous football is. They shoulda known better. 

Damar Hamlin definitely shoulda known better. Hamlin was born in 1998 in cosmopolitan Pittsburgh, went to a reputable Catholic high school, and ultimately attended the University of Pittsburgh, a hub of learning and research.

The thing is though, zero people were talking about football players and CTE in 1998, and Hamlin was actually born and raised in McKees Rocks (part of the Pittsburgh metropolitan area), which had a median household income of $22,278 in 2010. When Hamlin was a kid, his dad spent three years in jail for selling drugs and three of his friends died from gun violence. So let's just say that neurological trauma was the furthest thing from Hamlin's mind and football may have seemed like one of the only ways out.

Still though, when Hamlin first put on a helmet, he must have known the risks. He must have known about the concussions, the neck injuries, the spinal injuries, the paralysis, the CTE, and the disproportionate share of former NFL players who commit suicide. He must have known, right?

Fuck no, he didn't know. And neither did Micah Hyde, Dane Jackson, or Junior Seau. Or any other current and former NFL player when they were six years old and made their first tackle. 

You know who else didn't know? Heisman trophy winner and former NFL All-Pro Bo Jackson. Remember him? "Bo knows football. Bo knows baseball. Bo knows..." 

In 2017, Bo Jackson said that if he had known about the risks associated with CTE, he never would have played football and that there's no way he would allow his kids to play today.

No, I don't wish Damar Hamlin had died. But if he had, I would hope that a silver lining of his death might be that you, the casual NFL fan, might reevaluate your life choices and decide not to put your eyeballs on the modern-day version of Roman gladiators.

I know 40-yard touchdown passes are exciting and that the Cowboys cheerleaders are pleasant to look at, but the NFL is, quite literally, killing people. Perhaps if Hamlin had died, he would have whispered, in his dying breath, "Are you not entertained?!?"