The Second Darkest Day

Do you know who the boss is in my house? No, I’m not asking if you know who the Boss is. I know you know her. She’s the sexy 46-year-old with the not saggy arms. I’m asking if you know who the real boss is in my house.

It’s me.

Sure, the Boss runs the legislative and executive branches by creating the grocery list (writing policy) and going shopping (executing policy), but I run the judicial branch by deciding if the grocery list is constitutional (interpreting policy). I get to sit back in my La-Z-Boy Chair of Judgment and say whether or not buying two boxes of Apple Jacks is consistent with the values and principles upon which our nation, I mean our family, is based.

I may not be the sexiest person in the house. I may not be the one who jets from coast to coast for meetings, who gets invited to be on roundtables with state attorneys general from across the country, and who’s always on CNN. But I am, ultimately, the most powerful entity in this household. I’m the one who gets to say, “Yes, 25 minutes per day of Fortnite for young Broosevelt is constitutional,” or “No, paying $35 for Panini’s Uber is unconstitutional.” I’m the one who gets the final word.

Similarly, the Supreme Court isn't sexy but it is arguably the most powerful of the three branches of our government because it gets the final word. It got to ultimately decide if white kids needed to go to school with black kids (Brown), if corporations could rape our elections (Citizens United), and, speaking of rape, if a woman who was raped and wants to end her pregnancy needs a doctor or a coat hanger (Dobbs). Yes. Yes. Hanger. Looks like we won one and lost two.

Quick aside: Did you know the Supreme Court confirmed its power of judicial review by limiting its own power? In 1803, it struck down part of a 1789 Congressional act by arguing that the act had given the Court too much authority. In so doing, the Supreme Court announced to the world that it could invalidate laws that violated the Constitution. In other words, it had the final word.

Given the power of the Supreme Court, its decision on Monday to offer immunity to our beloved former (and future?) leader, Donald J. Trump, marks, in my opinion, the second darkest day in the history of our country. See, it’s one thing for someone to do something wrong. But it’s a whole ‘nother thing for that person to get away with it.

It was dark when the South seceded from the Union. But we sacrificed over 600,000 people and forced those bigots to be part of our country. Victory!

It was dark when we forced Japanese Americans into internment camps during World War II but the Supreme Court ultimately ruled that the U.S. government could not detain loyal citizens. Moreover, Japanese Americans were allowed to serve in the war, a presidential commission in the late ‘70s and early ‘80s concluded that the camps had been a product of racism, and nearly $2 billion was disbursed to the tens of thousands of Japanese Americans who had been incarcerated. Most importantly, hundreds of millions of Americans realized how unjust and awful these camps were when Daniel-san discovered a box containing references to the deaths of Mr. Miyagi’s wife and child in the Manzanar internment camp.

It was dark in the ‘70s when Tricky Dick’s chronies broke into the DNC headquarters but Nixon resigned when impeachment was imminent. Sure, Ford pardoned him soon after but at least we got halfway there.

It was dark in the ‘80s when we secretly sold weapons to Iran and illegally siphoned those funds to right-wing rebel groups in Nicaragua, but a number of top officials were indicted and convicted. Sure, Reagan got away with it and Bush Sr. pardoned those officials in the final days of his presidency, but at least we got halfway there.

It was dark in the ‘90s when Clinton had sex with anyone with breasts and then perjured himself but Slick Willie (the man, not the penis) was impeached. Sure, the Senate didn’t convict and Clinton served out his time in office, but at least we got halfway there.

What’s happening now is new and different. Someone has done something wrong and, it appears, is going to completely get away with it. Specifically, in addition to obstructing justice, purging whistleblowers, and grabbing women by the pussy, Donald Jerkoff Trump demanded that the Georgia Secretary of State find him 12,000 votes, pressured Pence not to certify the 2020 election, and encouraged the descendants of those who seceded from the Union (see above) to storm the Capitol.

The legislative branch mostly did its job and impeached Trump (twice). The executive branch has mostly done its job and already convicted Trump of a felony. But the judicial branch - those with the final word - have now decided that Trump has certain presidential immunities, and therefore this Grand Wizard is likely going to get away with everything he has done.

So what is the darkest day, you ask? It won’t be the day when, based on Monday’s ruling, a lower court decides Trump is immune from prosecution for Alleged Crime X. It won’t be the day when, based on Monday’s ruling, the Supreme Court overturns a lower court’s ruling and decides Trump is immune from prosecution for Alleged Crime X. And it sure as hell won’t be the day when the Boss decides to buy two boxes of Apple Jacks on her own.

The darkest day will be November 5th, 2024 when American voters - those with the final final word - re-elect Donald Jagoff Trump as President of the United States of America.

Here’s hoping We the People don’t let that darkest of days occur.